Another Year

Sigh, I’m really 30 years old now. I have to admit, after reaching 21 or 22, life just flies by, and it’s just one year after another. In the past year, I’ve experienced many significant events - buying a house, getting married, going on a honeymoon, and winning an award for a paper I submitted. Logically, the past year should have been incredibly exciting, with a clear main storyline and intricate subplots. However, the truth is that I’ve been worrying and feeling lost throughout the year. Perhaps it’s because life has been too comfortable, and I’ve unknowingly become lazy.

This year, I missed the deadline for reviewing a paper for the first time, and I also missed the deadline for two grant applications. I promised to help a colleague write a book, but I couldn’t deliver the manuscript on time. I also promised to write a letter of recommendation for a student, but I couldn’t submit it on time. I started writing a paper, but I lost interest after a few sentences. I was supposed to help someone edit their manuscript, but I kept putting it off. I haven’t had time to work on my own research either.

To comfort myself, I’ve been making excuses for my procrastination, saying that teaching is too exhausting. But if I think about it carefully, teaching isn’t that tough, and I don’t spend most of my time preparing lessons. Usually, I just scramble to find something to teach when the deadline is looming.

Sometimes, I really feel like I don’t understand myself.

Finally, following the usual pattern of writing a yearly reflection, here’s my outlook for the upcoming year:

I hope that in 2018, I can clearly define my short-term and long-term goals, and then take concrete steps to achieve them, one step at a time.

In the end, I must remember this advice: 吃得苦中苦方为人上人, which means that one must endure hardship to succeed.

Let’s keep working hard.